yes it has been, i have my reasons though...
for the past few weeks I have been living life with no air.
not literally now, just hear me out, here goes.
Wednesday October 6
the day before Anna leaves for Africa.
my air left.
It was homecoming week and school was going great but on Wednesday when I got home I really felt the pressure.
Anna was finishing EVERYTHING trying to at least and my mother and I had church
all I wanted was 30 minutes with my sister.
packing took to long, supper was crazy, and the emotions overtook us all.
at church that night I laid on the pew and cried.
over and over again in my head just whispering,
"please Lord, keep her safe, keep her healthy, change her World"
I didn't know that Anna and I would not be going out for Dairy Queen until I read my moms text message from Anna that said, "a little emotional tonight, don't know if I can do anything with Maria."
I understood and didn't push for my 30 minutes at all anymore I perfectly got it...
Instead I took that time to write a piece of me she could have in Africa. A Letter.
I went to bed praying.
Friday October 8
Homecoming!!!
I mentioned how my day was great and how it melted into PURE JOY
and how to God be all the glory through all things...
well my night was great.
I slow danced, he swept me off of my feet...
My family quickly slapped me back into reality the next day, NO JOKE.
I am thankful for that.
anyways yes.
Anna made it to Africa
GREAT.
Sunday October 10
may I mention that on Saturday we had spoke with Anna and she was a little disgruntled by the volunteers and situations at the orphanage but living and getting adjusted.
yes.
we all prayed.
anyways Sunday, we got an email from Anna that explained the situations.
all I can say is I couldn't breathe that day...
we talked to Anna and she was terrified.
she wanted to turn around and come home.
I remember just wanting the day to be over and laying in bed crying, praying.
why God why???
I cried that night I had no air...
I wanted my sister to be rocking a baby to sleep on a nice rocking chair in a nice building, mending a heart that I myself couldn't... I now just wanted her home to hug and have a Dairy Queen with,
I wanted my 30 minutes back.
Lets say there was more then one restless heart in the house that night.
Monday October 11
I went back to school it is my way of coping...
I pray for things and continue with my life.
until I get home where I see that we are not quite whole yet
one is not safe so yet we all aren't...
So the beginning of my days with no air, did you think I should already be dead.
yeah, I kind of thought so too...
something sustained me though.
My Daddy, my King
I was also looking forward to Minnesota Youth Convention
a gathering of young God filled students in Rochester, MN where we can rejoice in the Lord and just simply have fun !!!
can I start a new post...
I think I will you guys need a break..
to be continued,
the day before Anna leaves for Africa.
my air left.
It was homecoming week and school was going great but on Wednesday when I got home I really felt the pressure.
Anna was finishing EVERYTHING trying to at least and my mother and I had church
all I wanted was 30 minutes with my sister.
packing took to long, supper was crazy, and the emotions overtook us all.
at church that night I laid on the pew and cried.
over and over again in my head just whispering,
"please Lord, keep her safe, keep her healthy, change her World"
I didn't know that Anna and I would not be going out for Dairy Queen until I read my moms text message from Anna that said, "a little emotional tonight, don't know if I can do anything with Maria."
I understood and didn't push for my 30 minutes at all anymore I perfectly got it...
Instead I took that time to write a piece of me she could have in Africa. A Letter.
I went to bed praying.
Friday October 8
Homecoming!!!
I mentioned how my day was great and how it melted into PURE JOY
and how to God be all the glory through all things...
well my night was great.
I slow danced, he swept me off of my feet...
My family quickly slapped me back into reality the next day, NO JOKE.
I am thankful for that.
anyways yes.
Anna made it to Africa
GREAT.
Sunday October 10
may I mention that on Saturday we had spoke with Anna and she was a little disgruntled by the volunteers and situations at the orphanage but living and getting adjusted.
yes.
we all prayed.
anyways Sunday, we got an email from Anna that explained the situations.
all I can say is I couldn't breathe that day...
we talked to Anna and she was terrified.
she wanted to turn around and come home.
I remember just wanting the day to be over and laying in bed crying, praying.
why God why???
I cried that night I had no air...
I wanted my sister to be rocking a baby to sleep on a nice rocking chair in a nice building, mending a heart that I myself couldn't... I now just wanted her home to hug and have a Dairy Queen with,
I wanted my 30 minutes back.
Lets say there was more then one restless heart in the house that night.
Monday October 11
I went back to school it is my way of coping...
I pray for things and continue with my life.
until I get home where I see that we are not quite whole yet
one is not safe so yet we all aren't...
So the beginning of my days with no air, did you think I should already be dead.
yeah, I kind of thought so too...
something sustained me though.
My Daddy, my King
I was also looking forward to Minnesota Youth Convention
a gathering of young God filled students in Rochester, MN where we can rejoice in the Lord and just simply have fun !!!
can I start a new post...
I think I will you guys need a break..
to be continued,
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